A man is lying on the beach, wearing nothing but a cap over his crotch.
A woman passing by remarks,
“If you were any sort of a gentleman,
you would lift your hat to a lady.”
He replies, “If you were any sort of a h*t lad*,
the hat would l*ft by itse*f.”
2nd joke: Just women things…
When a customer left his cell phone in my store,
I scrolled through his saved numbers, stopped at “Mom” and pushed send.
His mother answered, and I told her what happened.
“Don’t worry,” she said, “I’ll take care of it.”
A few minutes later, the cell phone rang. It was “Mom.”
“Martin,” she said, “you left your cell phone at the convenience store.”
HHAHAHAHAHAHA
THE END!!!!!!